Stand-up comedians have always said what others are afraid to. These seven holiday stand-up routines are artfully done, showing the everyday person why what they are doing every year during the holidays can be bat-sh** crazy. Why is Jesus’ birthday the most materialistic day of the year? Why do we continue to talk about the same stuff every year with our family members? And why is it that Santa Claus won’t bring Sarah Silverman any presents? Comedians help us reflect on what we really want out of the holiday season and all the absurd moments that go along with it. Enjoy!
Jim Gaffigan’s Holiday Traditions
In this segment from his 2005 special, Beyond The Pale, comedy extraordinaire, Jim Gaffigan, walks us through absurd human behavior around the holidays. From hanging socks over the fireplace during Christmas to hiding eggs around the yard on Easter Sunday (does it all revolve around Jesus…?) Gaffigan’s holiday stand-up routine makes everything we do seem strange.
Sarah Silverman Takes On Mr. Claus
“What Would Jesus Do?” asks Silverman in her original song, “Give the Jew Girl Toys.” Feeling neglected because of her religion, Silverman is just looking for some love from the big bearded man we’ve come to know as Santa Claus (is that German?), who she even offers to date. If you ask me, it depends on the present.
David Sedaris’ Santaland Diaries
“I’m a 33 year old man applying for a job as an elf.”
It’s 1992 in New York City and hilarious essayist, David Sedaris, is an elf at Macy’s’ Santaland. He failed his drug test, but still landed the gig due to his height. His elf name is Crumpet. Reading directly from his diary during this time, Sedaris invites us to laugh at his misfortunes whether it’s being forced to sing “Jingle Bells” to a screaming child, or when he was led on by an elf named Snowball.
Chris Rock On Christmas Commercialized
Amongst other things, Chris Rock leans into Christmas (5:05), exposing the ways in which our society has commercialized Jesus, the least materialistic guy’s, birthday. “No bling on Jesus!”
Literally Santa Claus
“You guys know that I’m just your parents right?” Watch angsty leftist Santa drop a little knowledge on ignorant capitalist America. “Truth” is what he’s spewin’ and no plastic wrapping is gonna stop him.
Steve Martin’s Christmas Classic
Steve Martin has more than one wish. Enough said.
Jerry Seinfeld Is Over the Holidays
Jerry Seinfeld reminds us that the most monotonous and awkward family moments tend to take place in the living room. When do you use the living room? Holidays. Think back to the post-meal conversations, the small talk, the small stream of drool dribbling from the corner of your great aunt’s mouth. At the end of the day it all ends with the same question: “Well, what are ya gonna do?”